Attention Deficit Disorder

The thing I hate most about ADD is my impulsivity - It can get me into a lot of trouble even when I have the best of intentions (some major trouble areas for me are spending and saying what's on my mind when I aught not).  Thing I love most about my ADD is what I can accomplish... I can do many things at once.  Many people don't know how I can do all of the things I do, I have six children, run a successful non-profit organization, run two small businesses, and attend to all of the hundreds of things it takes to run a home and attend to a family.  Thing is I don't know how to do it any other way.  I'm not good at relaxing - It makes me uncomfortable.  I like doing!  ADD in my opinion would be better labeled Attention Surplus Disorder.  There are definitely positive characteristics such as spontaneity, creativity and a zest for new experiences as pluses about having ADD.

Someone once described ADD as "It's like being super-charged all the time. You get one idea and you have to act on it, and then, what do you know, but you've got another idea before you've finished up with the first one, and so you go for that one, but of course a third idea intercepts the second, and you just have to follow that one, and pretty soon people are calling you disorganized and impulsive and all sorts of impolite words that miss the point completely. Because you're trying really hard. You're just being pulled in lots of directions".

My three children with ADD and myself all have VERY different personalities as does my brother with ADD and my nephew with ADD - we are different people.  Each has different ways of coping with the ADD and what works for one does not necessarily work for the other.  What we as a family tend to have in common is a high degree of stubbornness and higher IQ, one helps - one does not.

CLICK HERE To read some profiles of people with ADD from "Born To Explore"

Approximately 6% of the U.S. population has ADD. 
Common symptoms of ADD include: often fails to give close attention to details or makes careless mistakes; often has difficulty sustaining attention to tasks; often does not seem to listen when spoken to directly; often fails to follow instructions carefully and completely; losing or forgetting important things; feeling restless, often fidgeting with hands or feet, or squirming; running or climbing excessively; often talks excessively; often blurts out answers before hearing the whole question; often has difficulty awaiting turn. It should be kept in mind that the exact nature and severity of ADD symptoms varies from person to person however. Approximately one-third of people with ADD do not have the hyperactive or overactive behavior component.

ADD is NOT caused by poor parenting, family problems, poor teachers or schools, too much TV, or excess sugar. ADD IS caused by biological factors which influence neurotransmitter activity in certain parts of the brain, and which have a strong genetic basis.  If one person in a family is diagnosed with ADD there is a 35% probability that any other family member also has ADD, compared to a 6% probability for someone in the general population. I have ADD and three of my children have ADD.  Research indicates that about 50% of children with ADD will not outgrow the condition and will become adults with ADD.

Learning coping skills and adaptive behaviors tends to be the best long term solution to dealing with ADD.   I am not necessarily an advocate of medication but Ritalin, Dexedrine and Adderol are commonly used.  Research is beginning to show that nutrition can play a large role in managing symptoms.

Behavior therapy and cognitive therapy may be helpful to modify certain behaviors and to deal with the emotional effects of ADD. Many adults also benefit from working with an ADD coach to help manage problem behaviors and develop coping skills, such as improving organizational skills and improving productivity.

Research indicates that when parenting a child with ADD you should:

• Provide clear, consistent expectations, directions and limits.
• Set up an effective discipline system. 
• Create a behavior modification plan to change the most problematic behaviors. 
• Assist your child with social issues. 
• Praise children for effort not intelligence.  (many people with ADD have high intelligence but quit projects, jobs and relationships)
• Identify your child's strengths and build upon these strengths so that your child has a sense of pride and accomplishment. 
• Set aside a daily "special time" for your child. 
• Tell your child that you love and support him or her unconditionally. Let your child know that you will get through the smooth and rough times together. (My mother always told us we were the prettiest, smartest kids who could do anything if we wanted to work at it - we knew that wasn't exactly true but it really helped to get through the rough times.)

What Tricks Have I learned?

Communication & Self Imposed Behavior Modification

• Talk to myself or others about the process.  For example when a staff person comes to me with a tough question I talk it out with them (or just in front of them).  It helps them to understand how I arrived at a certain decision, allows them opportunity for input and helps me follow through to a solid decision instead of the first thing that comes to mind.  Staff have seen me come about full circle in this process.

• Ask others where they think we're at on a project.  It's good for communication and reminds us all of what we have to do.  As a staff we do weekly updates for each other and e-mail them out - keeps us all informed and keeps us on track with our own activities as we report to others.

• Reward myself for completing tasks (allow myself a special treat for completing a long report or writing a grant) I manufacture these rewards in my head - most things I could do anyway but it helps to work for an instant reward upon project completion.  I could not have gotten through all of those years of college without this trick - reading text books is not great for someone with ADD (now reading magazines - that's better and often is used to reward myself.

• Do work I love.  When I have passion I can focus my attention.  I'm good at what I have passion for.  I couldn't stay at a job where I couldn't be flexible and creative.

What I still have to learn - I push myself very hard, only slowing down when I get sick.  This tends to be a cycle with me - I work many hours a week more than double an average work week - on a good week - then after a period of time I end up sick in bed.  It's my body saying STOP!  I'm trying to learn to relax a little - but I'm not very good at it.  What I am better at is taking time to do active things that are not work - this is a step in the right direction - at least I'm doing recreation!

In my opinion a person with ADD and good self esteem 
can accomplish ANYTHING!